Twilight: New Moon – Caption This!

By Mark Ramsey | 2009/11/20



54 Responses to “Twilight: New Moon – Caption This!”

  1. Mark Ramsey says:

    “Who needs a shirt when you can iron your chest hair!”

  2. Xottawan says:

    “OK…so I’m not Tiger. But at least I use condoms.”

  3. dude says:

    Eww, eww, eww; get away from me! you look masculine and have some color in your cheeks; you’re not my type AT ALL

  4. Wilbur Like Smith says:

    Know where I can get some True Blood?

  5. ian says:

    oh…you’re a dude too……..

  6. BJ says:

    “Before you kiss me, try this dog breath remedy”

  7. Zonkie the Great says:

    Why?? WHY won’t you attempt suicide for ME???

  8. Rose says:

    Bella: Wait one second Jacob, I can smell Edward from here. Dude needs to take a shower or something.

  9. Christina says:

    “Heh, you do look like those zombies in I am Legend.”

  10. Carolyn says:

    I’m sorry you got hurt, Bella, but seriously – I can’t keep *these* guns holstered.

  11. Mak says:

    Why yes, I do obsessively go to the gym and hate on Vampires

  12. Littlefrench says:

    Bella : “Jacob, you can’t go without a shirt ! You should have told me about, I have enough money for two.”

  13. Foggy Joe says:

    Bella, the tide is coming in and I can’t wet. Remember the
    witch in the Wizard of Oz. We must leave.

    But…but I thought we were here to dig some clams.

  14. TommyB says:

    What? Wet kiss? And I didn’t even use my tongue!

  15. John Gallen says:

    Are you the corpse of Brittany Murphy?

  16. Alex Johnson-Woodford says:

    Don’t be scared, Bella! I’m far too non-heterosexual to ever try to touch you. I mean, I listen to freaking Earth, Wind, and Fire!

  17. Robert says:

    If you lie down with dogs, you will get up with sand in your underwear

  18. Christian says:

    No, no. It looks good. Are you using your retainer at night?

  19. Petros says:

    Yes. Umm… I’m sure it does taste just like chicken but I’m not into “Moon Men” or whatever you call yourself in this dustheap, wherever it is, and I really, really do not want to know what kind of dance the Moon Crabs do here…

  20. Wizard says:

    You’d look this surly too if your clothes were all wet, you had sand in your hair and your sparkling boyfriend disappeared for weeks at a time.

  21. Shawn says:

    This romance is definitely “on the rocks”!

  22. J. Matt says:

    “Bella, promise me you won’t look at me or Edward directly in the eyes for the rest of the movie.”

  23. Kyle says:

    Jacob couldn’t help but realize he’d wrestled stronger angels…

  24. Michael Bailiff says:

    “This is where we would kiss if I was attracted to girls”

  25. Alex >P says:

    now just put that hand a little closer to my pants,

  26. thecool says:

    I’m muscular, my boobs are bigger than yours and my nipples could cut glass right now. Why don’t you like me?

  27. Steffen Ingvorsen says:

    CHRIST! let me reach into my pocket and get you some gum!

  28. Casper says:

    Do these shorts make me look gay?

  29. Dan McD. says:

    Yes, you actually got the Joan Jett role. I’m as surprised as you.

  30. paul says:

    “I’m a sucker for a guy wearing cherry red lipstick and dark eyeliners…”

  31. Marshall says:

    Um, is that Axe?

  32. donuteyes says:

    kristen stewart and taylor lautner begin filming “from here to obscurity.”

  33. Bob says:

    Jacob: Thank you for jumping into the water! I was running out of reasons for taking off my shirt!

  34. Lia says:

    I’ll tell your son you loved him. By the way he’s pretty hot.

  35. ADQ says:


  36. jeremy says:

    Wait! Stop!! My last boyfriend glitters when we do this, What do you do?

  37. Rono says:

    Jacob: “your penis is bigger than mine…!”

  38. Angela says:

    “Your hair…’s so…..smooth, so free of split ends. What kind of conditioner do you use? Redken?”

  39. Jimmy says:

    do you realize this movie is the best one we will be involved in? life sucks

  40. David Hernandez says:

    “Sharkboy? How’d you get in this movie? Oh well. Let’s make out!”

  41. David Hernandez says:

    XD can’t stop laughing

  42. Roxie says:

    HA! Left hand Blue! I win! I just love Twister, don’t you?

  43. Praetorian says:

    ” Your a keeper” ” That is to say that you are a lot bigger than the one I had to through back yesterday” ” By the way ” “whats up with the no tails?” ” I was told you Guy`s had tails?

  44. Nikl says:

    Couldn’t we just have gone to Hyde Park… the gravel’s really uncomfortable….

  45. smurfpants says:

    …something about dead girl camel toe? Dammit, this joke is not going to write itself.

  46. Randall Michels says:

    “What’s that smell? It smells like low tide. Did you forget to wash under your arms again?”

  47. smellnoirlater says:

    So then I attended the Disney School of Acting and…….I love you…suurprrise–ACTING!!!

  48. smellnoirlater says:

    TEAMWORK: let our powers combine…earth! fire! wind!water!…heart! GO PLANET!

  49. smellnoirlater says:

    Bella : something smells like wet dog….. my bad its me.

  50. smellnoirlater says:

    Bella; OH GAWd… I got gravel up my asscrack.

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